Five years ago we closed the door to our Parisian apartment for the last time.
It has only been five years, yet it seems a lifetime ago.
After six years living in the city of lights, we were starting a new adventure and moving to… China.
It was a bundle of feelings – scary and sad, but thrilling and exciting at the same time.
Seeing a place where you lived, that is yours bare and empty is always very strange. Stripped of all your belongings, it suddenly seems lifeless. And you know a huge chapter of your life is ending. But with that a new one is about to start.
In some ways I find it bitter sweet. I feel guilty about saying goodbye, of just being able to close the door and turn my back on it. Of moving on. It’s so easy in a way – just close the door and that is it. And I want to capture it all. So I take lots of photos, of every room, at every angle, to keep it safe in my memory. But that isn’t really needed at all. I am taking photos of an empty space, that looks nothing like it did when our stuff was in it. Those are the real memories. But I meticulously take the photos, almost like part of a ritual, even though we hardly ever look at them again, even though that is not how we are going to remember it.
And we move on.
It’s realising it is the ‘end of an era’ that brings out the blues. That a time of our lives which we cherished is coming to an end. But I don’t get an ’empty’ feeling. Rather, I am filled with the anticipation of possibility of what lies ahead, the unknown – exciting and ready to unfold.
I like change. I like moving around. I love discovering a new place that I am going to call home. I love having someone I love to share that with me. It has made us grow closer and stronger as a couple. Adding more memories to our incredible story of life.
It doesn’t mean I am turning the page and forgetting what has been. But I am ready for the next adventure. And that fires me up.
I would love to hear from you and your experiences about moving on, whatever they may be.
So do drop me a line at firstname.lastname@example.org or leave a comment below.